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Shed Those Tears. It’s Okay.

Oct. 20, 2011 by Keiko Zoll

That ultrasound photo with a due date status from a high school acquaintance on Facebook.

The dear friend who’s been encountering fertility issues who confides in you that she’s pregnant.

The new “I’m so glad we’re parents together” wedding anniversary cards.

The wedding ceremony that wishes a bounty of children on the new married couple.

The “expectant mothers parking” sign in front of CVS.

The baby shower gift you wish someone would give you one day.

The High Holiday service you couldn’t bear to go to this year.

“Fix You” by Coldplay.

The peer group where everyone got pregnant but you.

The formerly infertile Twitter follower who complains about her pregnancy.

The second “lap” of babies by your friends, your coworkers, your family.

The moment you learned your niece just said your name.

The tampon wrappers, the pantyliners, those reminders in the bathroom.

For all of these these moments:

You shed those tears. It’s okay.

Tears are just a part of the infertility journey, like it or not.

Features, Healing

Comments

  1. Mali says

    Oct. 22, 2011 at 7:22 PM

    Lovely. Gradually, the tears come less and less. But they still visit. It’s okay.

  2. Sarah says

    Oct. 21, 2011 at 5:10 PM

    {{{HUGS}}}

    I cried this morning for my friend when she announced she’s going to be an aunt – again. I keep praying she gets to announce her own baby.

  3. Kelly says

    Oct. 21, 2011 at 12:42 PM

    Amen.

  4. Jonelle says

    Oct. 21, 2011 at 12:00 AM

    Thanks, Keiko. I needed to hear that and be reassured that my pain is valid, and that its okay to shed those tears when life gets to be too much.

    (((HUGS)))

  5. Sara says

    Oct. 20, 2011 at 5:59 PM

    So true. I hope that the occasion for this post wasn’t some tears of your own, but I’m guessing that it was. Hugs.

  6. Embracing says

    Oct. 20, 2011 at 4:11 PM

    ((((Hugs)))) Such a beautifully written post.

  7. Kimberly says

    Oct. 20, 2011 at 3:22 PM

    Thank you for the beautiful words that remind me that my pain is valid and the tears are ok. *hug*

  8. Lora says

    Oct. 20, 2011 at 1:20 PM

    So very true – I just found out Sunday that my younger sister is pregnant with their second child. We’ve been TTC since they started dating so this is a hard pill to swallow for us. :'( Alot of tears on this journey for sure…

  9. Courtney says

    Oct. 20, 2011 at 12:53 PM

    I found myself nodding in agreement to each one. Thank you for this.

  10. Gee says

    Oct. 20, 2011 at 11:18 AM

    I think it’s hard to let go of the idea that tears are a sign of weakness. All of those are so familiar to me, but always suffered privately, like they are shameful in some way.

  11. Mo says

    Oct. 20, 2011 at 11:08 AM

    beautifully written, as usual.

  12. Holly says

    Oct. 20, 2011 at 11:08 AM

    This is just what I needed to hear.
    Thank you.

  13. Jen says

    Oct. 20, 2011 at 10:15 AM

    Every single one of those sounds so familiar. Many, many tears have been shed…

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