In thousands of synagogues and temples this morning, the story of Hannah is being chanted around the world. Hannah, as you may or may not know, weeps and prays before the Lord, to answer her prayers for a son in her barrenness. In recent years, as I cope with my own diagnosis of infertility, the reading from the Book of Hannah has become an incredibly painful but necessary part of the Rosh HaShanah holiday for me. But this year, it’s just too much for me, so we’ll be sitting out the traditional Torah and Haftorah portions and participating in some alternative observances instead.
Still, as Hannah wept and prayed, so too do I pray on this New Year.
On Rosh HaShanah It is Written and on Yom Kippur It is Sealed…
O Adonai, G-d of our Ancestors, Avinu Malkeinu, Our Father, Our King:
Let this be the year.
O Shechinah, Creator of Creation, Immeinu Malkatenu, Our Mother, Our Queen:
Let this be the year.
…how many shall pass on, and how many shall be born.
I call out to You today as Hannah called out to You thousands of years ago:
“Lord, why have You forgotten me?”
In my tears, I call out to You, O Lord:
Will you remember me this year, as you remembered Rachel?
Will you remember me?
And so I pray.
On Rosh HaShanah It is Written and on Yom Kippur It is Sealed…
Let this be the year.
…how many shall be born.
Let this be the year.
O Lord, O Adonai, O Shechinah –
I implore, I cry out, I beseech You –
please –
Let this be the year.
Kein y’hi ratzon –
May it be Your Will.
How much this post speaks to me. Last year, I cried in shul because the Rabbi spoke about Chana and infertility. I had no words left, except “please”. Please G-d, please hear me. that’s all i had left to say, nothing as eloquent as Chana’s prayers. A year later, i went back, this time holding my son. Thank G-d i said (at the Bris) for this moment. I pray for a child for you Keiko. May your new year be filled with sweetness and joy.
Thank you so much for this blog. Shanah Tova, Keiko/Miriam. May this indeed be the year for all of us.
Indeed. Thank you so much for the kind wishes and may this be the year for us all!
This brought tears to my eyes. The story of Hannah has made me cry every year. But since being diagnosed with infertility it really is just too much.
I’ve just been catching up on your conversion story and have been loving reading how you have come to your faith. Thank you so much for sharing. I look forward to the next part!
L’shana tova. Please let this be the year for all of us.
L’shana tovah to you & yours as well. This year, it was just too hard to sit through it, so we opted to do tashlich instead of going to services.
Happy New Year and I agree, please oh please, let this be the year.
Thanks!
Shana Tova hon. May this be our year.
*hugs*
Thank you – L’shana tovah to you as well. May it be the year for all of us!
*hugs*
Thanks hun 🙂
God hears your prayers, Keiko.
But I’ve kind of learnt not to keep asking for the same thing, I’m sure He heard me the first time.
I try and focus on different aspects e.g. help me feel grattitude for my dogs, appreciation for where I am right now…
as well as.. help me just get through this IVF and do all I can to make it a success.. the rest is in Your Very Capable Hands…
Thanks Heather – it’s all about perspective, indeed.