Accidentally, during a lovely nibbly dinner (I’ll define that later in this post) with my husband, I had a small IF breakdown.
We were watching a lil preseason football (Chargers/Falcons) on CBS, and an ad comes up for their new fall comedy, Accidentally on Purpose. From their website, the premise is this:
ACCIDENTALLY ON PURPOSE is a comedy starring Golden Globe Award winner Jenna Elfman as Billie, a single woman who finds herself “accidentally” pregnant after a one-night stand with a much younger guy, and decides to keep the baby. and the guy. A newspaper film critic, Billie is barely surviving a humiliating breakup with her charming boss, James (Grant Show), who’s still trying to resume their relationship. Suddenly expecting a child with her “boy toy,” Zack (Jon Foster), Billie and Zack make an arrangement: to live together platonically. Billie’s party girl best friend Olivia (Ashley Jensen), and Abby (Lennon Parham), her conventional, younger married sister, eagerly look forward to the new addition and offer their own brands of advice and encouragement. But when Zack and his freeloading friends, including Davis (Nicolas Wright), start to turn her place into a frat house, Billie isn’t sure if she’s living with a boyfriend, a roommate, or if she just has another child to raise.
*facepalm*
The kicker? That she’s 37 and happens to get knocked up. Now, I know I’ve got age on my side, but still – I can imagine this is harder for others who have age working against them.
I proceeded to stuff 3 asparagus spears into my mouth at once and chew angrily, sadly. Larry placed a reassuring hand on my leg – he knew it hit me hard, out of the blue.
A nibbly dinner is kind of like our version of poor man’s tapas -an assortment of cheeses, cornichons, sausage/meat, salad. Tonight we had fresh tomato and asparagus salad with balsamic, asagio fresco and st. albray cheeses, cornichons, and choriso. All fresh, all delish.
As I’m writing this, we’re flipping the channels and stopped on NBC to watch a lil Law & Order SVU… and it’s the pregnancy pact episode. Olivia was lecturing some knocked up teen. The lil spitfire gets up in the detective’s face and is like “What’s your deal? Wait too long? Older women are so jealous of me. Tick tock, tick tock!”
C’mon TV, really? I so rarely watch you lately, and this is what you throw at me?
(And of course, now I’m caught up in the episode, so I’m going to watch the rest of it now.)
Hi there Z,
Thanks for your input – it is much appreciated. In fact, I'd love to chat more. Feel free to shoot me an email at miriamshope AT gmail DOT com.
Hi there,
The premise of this show fills me with rage!
I've been reading your blog for a bit now. I discovered it because I too am living the infertility lifestyle and find comfort from others who are also in this predicament. I've been rooting for you for a while now! So many people are so stupid and say such insensitive things, always assuming that fertility is a given for everybody. My boss asked me the other day when I was planning on having a baby after the only other child-free person in my department announced their pregnancy. Imagine asking someone who is going through their second ivf cycle (of course he has no idea) when they plan on having a baby! Yeah buddy, I'm working on it. I am also, coincidentally, a former patient of Dr. Gross. I finally could not deal with him, his office, the hour long wait to see him once in the waiting room, his forgetfulness, his poor bedside manner…everything you have mentioned. Everyone told me he was brilliant, but I've been meaning to write to let you know that if you are frustrated..you can shop around! We are so lucky to live in MA where IVF is covered, most times, by your insurance (if you work for a company that has MA based insurance). I went to Boston IVF just for a consult and within a month I was doing my first cycle (which failed, but I'm keeping fingers crossed for the second..or third..whatever..)…I was amazed at how fast I got started after six months of putzing around at a snail's pace with dear old Dr. G.
So, I hope this isn't especially annoying, to hear from some random person that you have other options especially when you like Dr. Gross…but I just wanted to put it out there. A good friend of mine with 1 ovary and a very high FSH who was told she probably could not have children just had a little boy…she went to the Brigham and women's ivf clinic…it gives me hope.
So again, hope this isn't unwanted, annoying, etc…but just wanted to wish you the best of luck.
take care,
Z