Guest Post by Jessica Burgess
When you are trying to conceive, the two-week wait between ovulation and menstruation can seem like forever. Especially if conception is taking longer than you expected, waiting can be mentally taxing and emotionally draining. You can’t change the wait period, but you can change how you face it. Instead of letting infertility take over your life, control how you respond to the waiting with these four tips:
Allow Yourself Time to Obsess
Telling yourself to stop wouldn’t work anyway, would it? Instead of finding your mind drifting there – and then feeling annoyed and guilty – let yourself obsess. Schedule a time (15-minutes maybe?) in your day if that’s what it takes. Think about pregnancy symptoms or the lack thereof. Read your favorite infertility blogs. Daydream a bit about the excitement you may feel someday soon. If you don’t let yourself work through those feelings – good or bad – in a healthy way you won’t be emotionally and mentally prepared for whatever happens next. Your mind will be unsettled because it hasn’t been able to sort through what you are feeling. So let yourself experience the emotions of trying to conceive (TTC) – then once you have felt them move on and focus on something else. Trust me, it’ll be a lot easier once you do.
Stay Busy With Meaningful Activities
After your obsession-alloted time is over, get busy. Don’t think of activities as distractions, but things you can do to better yourself and be happy in the moment. Part of what makes TTC so hard is feeling like you are stuck in limbo. You are constantly waiting for something without much control over how or when the situation will change. You can use an ovulation calculator to determine your most fertile days, which can help minimize the number of months you’re TTC, but you’ll still have to wait. So spend that time wisely. Every month, schedule any lunch dates, girls nights or weekend classes for the two weeks after your expected ovulation. Check items off your to-do list, start a new project or pick up a hobby that you know you’ll be interested in whether or not you conceive this month.
Lean on the Support of People Who Understand
Having someone to talk to will help you cope with the anxiety of the two week wait (TWW). Whether a spouse, friend, parent or online forum member, seek out someone who is willing to listen. It’s tempting to keep things bottled up, not wanting to burden someone else or share intimate feelings and fears. But sharing your experiences can help you feel understood, loved and not alone. A confidant can be a great source of strength and support for you – even if you’ve never met them.
Situations that could be adding to your stress:
- Scare tactics, facts or blogs that leave you feeling negative
- People who aren’t sensitive to your situation
- Movies focused on conception, pregnancy or babies
- Baby showers, baby stores, friends who have babies
Popular relaxing techniques:
- Writing in a journal
- Doing breathing exercises
- Participating in yoga and other forms of exercise
Find Relaxing Techniques That Work for You
Don’t just consider relaxing techniques that help you feel calm, but also address any anxiety triggers. Once you do, it’ll be easier to steer clear of those situations (and people) or figure out how you can change your perspective, so the wait isn’t that difficult.
About the Guest Author, Jessica Burgess:
Jessica is a drama queen, freelance writer and scuba diver. She lives in Hawaii. There is nothing more important than a mother’s love for her child, and Jessica knows that. An avid scuba diver, she is one of few lactation specialists in her region (the Pacific), and she isn’t afraid of touting her knowledge of micronutrients and your baby’s health. She isn’t just a mom; she’s a former NICU nurse-turned-writer. Her only goal is to give you the nutritional and emotional tools you need to make the best of your new family addition.